Respect My Words
(Shahroz Bashir, karachi)
Where world has grown so fast, there are still people to love themselves n not compromising their ill habbits, they launch mysterious wave for hurting people, discouraging them and putting them down in their very own thoughts. This article is in response to many behaviors that I happened to observe during my own breaths. In this article, topics like how to tell something to someone, how to listen, why to listen and what is called imaginations and re creations. These pre-named elements are basic tools to carry out best conversation n making best teams n letting best ideas to develop in world of curiosity n fast car race and finally developing great sense of RESPECT.
People n their brains are having amazing stories to tell you, they’re just too curious to tell, how n what they know or may they feel. It may be about topic of Visits, tours, chit chats about friends, picnic with families, Re-created Ideas, imaginations, love n affection, experiences, doubts, finance & market high rising prices, technology or researches and I wonder how many there would be, but I really have big question mark in my mind, who is going to listen Me?
Lets begin glimpse with a baby, who pucks milk, cries like “ohaan oohaan”, has got natural reflexes, who doesn’t know how to talk, how to do many things which are supposedly to be done by a common human, who holds finger of his mom with complete contentment, who goes market n use only finger for demanding his desires, who fails to control his desires n his excitements n non-chalant behavior bring new ideas in form of note book drawings, making of building with toy of small building blocks, or may be in form of his crawling direction n patterns. He always get love of his mother, remains in shadows of complete secured hands, whose innocence is safeguarded n well respected, whose even small smile is encouraged, who is trusted n hoped to bring amazing changes, who is supposed to be part of FAMILY TEAM, and finally he is, who has to be the one to learn n make his own world of latter life and when he grows up, he boost his family team, favor it in thick n thin times, try to keep away any harm coming to it, making family a perfect example, these above discussed basic elements in this paragraph, “TRUST, HONESTY, CARE, ENCOURAGEMENT, EMPATHY n SYMPATHY” are so important for respect and betterment.
Most of people don’t want to listen, they just keep speaking n usually it hurts other as conversation doesn’t go in equilibrium and speaker only enjoys, where listener feels it annoying n’ relations get started to receive rusting properties. Well, there are different sort of people, some wants to listen, some wants to speak, lastly some people wants to speak n listen both. But let’s think, if there are two people who love speaking only n they’re to be together, how would it work? It would never work any way if they just go for what they desire.
What makes you feel comfortable in your family? What doesn’t let you feel alone when you get trouble? It’s just trust n love with your family n friends. These two elements are so essential for any relation. When you talk to your family, they encourage your right thoughts while helping you with wrong thoughts instead taunting on you. They feel what you feel. They become sad when you are sad and they’re happy when you are happy and this makes Family “A TEAM”. And Family Team is only best n most successful Team on Earth; Reason is Trust, love, Respect to each other’s thoughts n ideas and care.
We have to see what team is, and where key of its success lies. Key lies in Listening. Listening shows Respect n perfect empathy for others. Especially in Team, when everyone has to work together, for a cause, they’ve to be like one fist, in which all fingers share common palm or like stars, in which they’ve to share single sky. This is not easy but still easy to be done as key lies in listening property. Everyone is sent on earth with special ideas n creativity but most people discourage n all special ideas die before they come out of their mouth. This is exactly what doesn’t happen in Team, in team everyone listens, respects, speaks, shares, no one tries to be superior, and they try to run together with no one in front or behind but everyone along same line. But what if there’s a team and leader of that team wants to impose rules and doesn’t want to listen any one, members of team would feel it highly disrespecting and instead of inventing new ideas in positive aspect, members would think of leader in negative aspect and sense of beauty n peace fades away with no sign of TEAM any more.
Why should we listen to others? Even when we don’t want to? For this, you got to know why most of leaders of the world have had best capability of listening to others. Actually Listening brings a lot of information, understanding, knowledge about any subject and helps you a lot in gaining what you miss and most important thing; it lets you have enough time to put on observation while listening n gaining experiences of others. Most of leaders of the world, listen others just because they observe n try to understand where problem lies. If you speak only, you’d miss these observations n gain none but illusion of happiness. But still, if you don’t want to become leader, why should you listen then? Actually listening carries big sense of respecting. If you listen someone, it would build natural castle of Respect in heart of speaker, shinning stars in their minds about you and they would try to be your friend n help you always while thinking you a great personality keeping person n one of a kind person.
A listening heart is the beginning of all knowledge
Some people speak wrong, why should we listen them, why should we let them end when it causes us to get angry, why? Answer is so simple. In Medical world, I’ve learnt one thing, n the best thing I must say, that is “Respect your patients and do listen, what they’ve to say”
I know, meanings of above sentence are in different sense, but let me get you in the imaginary sense of this line, where explanation of this line is like, “Everyone in this world is your patient, and you got to listen what they say”. You’ve to remember or imagine or just suppose that you’re doctor, and doctors should be polite, even in psychiatric department, doctors have to be polite with them, no matter how harsh patient goes, but notice, what they get in the end, “BIG CHEERFUL SUCCESS”. This is the Policy, I used n use, and I know that everyone is my patient and I don’t have to be angry or feel irritated from someone who’s patient or suffering, instead I’d rather have to listen them, and this how it won’t trouble me since I’ve gotten positive perspective to perceive someone’s annoying thoughts, plus it would make speaker comfortable with you all the time without any hesitation. And in the END, you’ll earn Respect, and if you practice it with everyone, there wouldn’t be any single person on earth to hate you because you’ve such kind quality of giving respect by listening to them. If someone abuses you or speak absurd stuff, don’t get hyper, again think him as your patient, and try to find out what is trouble and help him.
While I’ve spoken a lot about listening, now I should turn to speakers. Good speaker should wait for his turn, Good speaker as always said, should be good listener as well because this makes perfect combination. Most people say, be what you are and I do agree with them, but saying what you’re having in your mind, could end up troubling you a lot. Good Speaker should check listener face, attitude, smile, mood and topic of interest before speaking. Only talking about your own interests come in Misuse of speaking, and this is where usually listener starts feeling annoying, n disrespect you. It’s just like
GIVE RESPECT AND BE RESPECTED
We have to choose varieties of word before speaking, we have to see who is listener, we’ve to speak according to their environment n their backgrounds, this nowhere means that you should speak stupid when you’re in company of them, or to lower yourself, it just means to choose the best to make listener comfortable. Best speaker creates best comfortable zone, where he looks into eyes during conversation, sometimes may break it, he speaks with smile on face, may be little one at least, with thoughts that listener is his childhood friend (may be you’re speaking to stranger, but this thoughts bring exciting energy within you, and that too natural), and lastly he cares what listener cares. This is when, person has to make good relation and maintain good conversation, but if there’re conflicting ideas, then a GOOD speaker waits for time n space to continue with it. Good speaker should not let his tongue flow, instead his words should be quite fabricated n well tested according to situations, most of time it comes from experience, and other times it’s natural. Speaker should not impose his words, or criticize frequently, instead he should be finding best solution to inform person about his mistakes, may be via internet or by discussing with friends or someone else without mentioning name.
Why we are lacking behind because we have good innovations like, we’ve texting services, email services, voice calls, video calls, private conferences, and many ways to communicate each other but we don’t make most of them. If we find someone so ODD while speaking or if we find mistakes, we shouldn’t criticize on face, because it can go harsh and it does for most of people. The best thing would be to send email or text and if person starts arguing on email or text, do not reply once you’re aware that you’ve defined enough.
Things that person notices in you, how precise, honest and good secret keeper you’re and most of all, how best you guide them truly while you’re nice to them during kind conversations. If you try to make someone feel as if you’re playing chess with them, it may cause them to think you smarter, but probably you won’t find great help from them at times of need because this behavior keeps person under doubts and in un-comfortable zone.
Now lets move to the concept that most of people do know but they don’t fuss over. Most people don’t realize what they’re doing while they are anger, and they put their anger on wrong person (guilt free person), how could anyone then love to listen those kinds of people? It would probably end days of respect. So be in your senses when you’re angry.
The true test of character is not how much we know how to do, but how we behave when we don't know what to do –
Now let me introduce some beautiful elements. Re-Creation and Imaginations are two different terms, usually used synonymously. Re creation refers to what you’ve seen n experienced and you’re creating same scenario of past in your mind and playing with that while imagination refers to amazingly world of unlimited thoughts, where nothing remain impossible. Positive imaginations, but perhaps impossible imaginations would puff amazing excitement in your voice n make your speech wonderfully amazing, like sometimes my friend avoids some negative aspect of his thoughts, while enjoying totally different imaginary world, giving him wonderful energy during his talks. Re creation while carries its own importance as it gives experience to learn, stay n live peacefully.
If you want to be respected, just adjust your feelings according to person, if person is excited, you should show excitement, if person is sad, you shouldn’t show sadness, but you should try to formulate imaginary stories or recreated stories to give moral support and likewise. In short, we’ve to encourage, n encouragement is most positive aspect of behavior.
Lastly, Good speaker should keep good listening power n ability to bear harshest comments and I’ve just mentioned that how to manage comments n words while thinking of patients.
For good relation n being respected, new ideas and inventions n innovative thoughts, we need to be good listener and if we get chance, we should be good speaker then. There are two ways to be good listener, either build great patience, or think everyone as your patient or client plus great power to connect you listened words with your imaginations. While for being good speaker, you have got to watch mood, speed, voice volume, excitement, lips shape, eyes folding extent and you’ve got to speak accordingly. And these are basic things for being respected. Think positive.
Name : Scientist Shehroz
Religion : Islam
Country : Pakistan
Aim : Peace n Truth
I paint objects as I think them, not as I see them.
Contact : SHAHROZ_4@yahoo.com
I’ll be glad to have your comments n feed backs